Conversations that Consider Needs

There is a four-step process that can help us have conversations that consider our own needs and the needs of another person.

  1. Being aware of what our needs are and if they are met or unmet. Our emotions, thoughts and behaviours give us clues as to what our needs are and whether they are met or unmet. All emotions, thoughts and behaviours stem from needs.
  2. Considering what the other person’s needs might be, and whether they are met or unmet. Another person’s behaviour gives us clues as to what they may be feeling and thinking, and what their met and unmet needs may be.
  3. We can think about strategies that may meet our most important needs and avoid creating unmet needs. We can think about strategies that may meet the other person’s most important needs and avoid creating unmet needs.
  4. We can make a request to the other person about a strategy to meet our needs and their needs. If the person says no to the request, we assume that this means we don’t have enough information about the other person’s needs. We can continue to inquire about their needs, or we can find other ways to meet our needs that don’t involve the person.

 

Translate »